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10/14/2011

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Gretchen - I too find the dangly ones ... less than attractive, but let's not hate on them, because they're an inherited trait, I was dismayed to discover - poor little fellas. Anyway, the danglier, the easier it is to get over the initial repulsion, because you don't have to get quite so close to the taint (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=taint). Also, I know a lot of actual SBM grandmas, and I know what you're talking about. Those washcloths get a workout. (Once a friend asked me if it was true that white people don't use washcloths. I was impressed she had the guts to ask, and I had to tell her yes, that stereotype is accurate to a degree.)

And Jo - that video is the most boring thing I've had to watch in a long time.

Nobody made you watch it!

Well you made me click on it. And then I kept waiting for it to get good and then I got too enervated to click the pause button.

wow you guys, that's really sweet. yes, people have what they have and it looks how it looks. but if what i've got doesn't do it for you, great. some people like what they like and can't help that too much. perhaps i could have added that, where love or even strong like is involved, my preference for a certain body part's appearance doesn't matter much at all. but if i'm just looking at a Balzac and it's the dangly kind, well, no thanks.

I deleted our comments to put them in the body of the post! And now we need more comments! Aaaaaaaahhhh!

Okay, okay, sorry, man. Fair enough. I didn't handle that well and I'm sorry.

Oops, I said handle.

You're right though. You don't have to like dangly balls or apologize for not liking them, in and of themselves. You are right. Everybody has preferences and to pretend otherwise is silly.

Wait! What ha happened? I was just saying that so our readers with dangly old man balls wouldn't feel bad. They're not my (peach) bag either!! Everyone is entitled to his/her preferences. But hey, we don't have any readers anyway...it's just us... Talking about balls to each other on the Internet.

ugh, bridget...i feel you on the labial rejuvenation. in LA, every magazine you open has ads for that shit. it never before occurred to me that there were ideal-typical labia. and now i think about it more than i even should, in addition to the myriad of body image issues i deal with during the normal day-to-day.

Crap! I posted as Sassmouth because it was from my phone. And I don't know how to change it. Love, Bridget.

Okay ladies. I am totally reading and snorting and otherwise enjoying TMI Friday. So I have some topic suggestions, not exactly questions... Ready? OK!

under-boob fungal rash
chafeing in the intra-thigh area
Why the fuck are all the pores in my face full of gunk?
Why the fucking fuck does my crotch have to sweat so much?
Does the epilady-type hair remover work, or just make one curse floridly?

xoxo

"Talking about balls to each other on the internet" seems like it ought to be enough to get us a book deal, don't you think? Or a pilot?

Also, don't confuse commenters with readers. I'm sure there are plenty of readers playing along at home, sitting in stunned silence with fixed expressions of pain and distaste, wishing they had that pill from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. We do love hearing from you, though, folks! Even if it's to vow never to return.

Oh and I have a quick and easy solution to unsightly labia.

GROW A DISCO BUSH.

FFK: in the spirit of TMI and in the vein of your topic suggestions, I ask this:
Does anyone else, in the early postpartum weeks of profuse sweat and milk leakage, wake up to nurse in the night and wonder what smells JUST LIKE CHEESEBURGERS? Well, I will tell you! It is the milk that has gotten under your boobs and mingled with your onion-licious sweat for three hours! And now it smells good enough to EAT!

Jo: a disco bush? But it might get caught in the bowling ball spinner I squat over to shine my nether regions to plastic, Barbie-like perfection?

Disco Bush FTW!!!!

Gretchen, I usually work up a nice ripe feta, myself.

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Read This, Fool

  • the modernity ward
    Jo's old blog! Chock full of comedy, ruthless honesty, bullshit, and cooters. Lots of cooters.